You don't mind if I watch you eat, do you? I didn't think so. I'll just sit right next to you. Close.
Is that brie? You are so fascinating when you eat brie. The way you spread it on a cracker and the lift it up to your mouth, biting into it with just enough force, not too much--that's the trick. Too much and the cracker might explode into shards. What a mess that would be. Amazing. I could watch this all day.
You know, if you did want to try that thing where you bite too hard, just to see what that is like, that would be OK.
Now look. Unbelievable. That thin slice of salami! That way you hold it with two fingers and then tear into it, breaking the pink and white-flecked circle, turning into a half moon of heaven. Did you go to school for that? I wonder.
And don't get me started on the whole fork thing. That takes real technique.
Oops! CRACKER DOWN! CRACKER DOWN! I'll just get that real quick.
I'm back. In-ter-esting.
Oh. Just a mushroom.
But now--are you kidding me--cracker, cheese, salami, cracker. It's like a tiny sandwich. I smell Nobel Prize.