Goddess of the Week: Eris

Eris is the Greek goddess of discord.  She is the sister and best friend of Ares, the god of war.  When she found out she was not invited to the wedding of Thetis (a sea goddess) and Peleus (a Greek king) she fought back as only Eris would.  She went to the wedding anyway.  She also brought a delicious apple, into which she carved the words "for the most beautiful."  Well, as you can imagine, this caused a stir at a wedding full of goddesses, all of whom took for granted that they were the most beautiful.  In particular, it caused a tussle between Venus (goddess of beauty), Hera (goddess of marriage) and Athena (goddess of wisdom).  All three goddesses insisted upon that apple, for whom, each believed, could be more worthy of the ripe and succulent fruit?  

Finally, they asked Zeus to decide.  Now Zeus was no fool.  No way would he get involved.  Instead, he told them to ask Paris, an incredibly good looking shepherd/prince named Paris who lived near the Greek city of Troy.  The goddesses agreed and went to earth in search of Paris.  Now, being wise women, they also hedged their bets.  When they found him, each goddess made sweetened the pot a little.  Athena told Paris that if he chose her, she would make him unbeatable in battle.  Hera promised that if he chose her, she would make him a great king.  And Venus said that if he chose her, he could have the most beautiful woman in the world.  Paris didn't think twice. He chose Venus, and in return he got the love of Helen -- as in Helen, the face that launched a thousand ships, as in Helen for whom the Greeks fought the Trojan War.

All this for an apple.  And all because Eris wasn't invited to Thetis's wedding. 

Personal attributes of Eris: vindictive and easily slighted.  Avoid her.

Channel this goddess when: Let's be honest, this isn't the best goddess to channel; she will only fill you with self loathing and make you mad.  But if you must...channel her when bitchy neighbors/frenemies gossip behind your back or when your inlaws are really pissing you off.  Just remember, there will be consequences to pay.  Is your mother-in-law claiming Thanksgiving dinner AGAIN really worth a war?