2/14/11

Goddess of the Week: Venus, of course

Early 20th century Valentine's Day card, showi...Image via WikipediaWell, Valentines, let's talk about love. Let's talk about Venus.

You know she's my favorite goddess, right? She's totally misunderstood. Everybody's all, "Oh, Venus, she's so slutty, what with always cheating on her husband." Or, "Oh, Venus, she's so vapid, what with rising up on a clamshell and playing with her hair."

Total lies. Well, not the slutty part, but she never fiddled with her hair, and the clamshell business was all product placement by the clam lobby.

Here's what people don't tell you: She rose from that "clamshell" because she predates all the Olympians and the Greeks had to find a way to incorporate her into their stories. She's totally ancient, ancient, ancient. And yet she rocked her toga. Also, despite her own many misadventures in love, she never gave up on it, and she always tried to spread the wealth.

Just ask Hippomenes. Hippomenes loved a beauty named Atalanta. Alas, Atalanta had vowed to only marry the man who could beat her in a foot race, and if you lost the foot race, you had to die. Many men challenged Atalanta. Many men died. But Hippomenes asked Venus for help. Venus gave him three apples. When the raise began, Hippomenes dropped an apple every time Atalanta started to pull ahead, and, each time, she stopped to pick it up. This gave Hippomenes the edge, and that allowed Hippomenes to win. Better yet, because of Venus, Atalanta loved him in return. So it was a happy ending*

In honor of love triumphing over death, I give you Venus's Apple (the cocktail).

Barely wet the rim of a champagne flute and dip it in superfine sugar. Add equal parts Crown Royal, Apple Pucker, and Cranberry Juice. Mix with a sexy cocktail stirrer. Drop in two conversation hearts. Toast love and all things pink. Enjoy!**

Need a goddess: I got goddesses! Post a comment explaining what you need or want a goddess to help you with. I'll do the rest.

(*Full Disclosure: Unfortunately, Hippomenes and Atalanta forgot to thank Venus. So she compelled them to have sex in another goddess's temple fully knowing that that goddess would get mad and turn them into lions. To this day, Hippomenes and Atalanta have to pull that goddess around in a chariot.)

(**Fuller Disclosure: This cocktail is courtesy my good friend, Katherine, mixologist extraordinaire, although I did invent the name. What do you think? Is the name Venus's Apple zippy enough? Can we do better?)
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17 comments:

Olga said...

Venus's Nipple?? Just a thought.

Margaret said...

Ah! That is sexier.

Pasadena Adjacent said...

An old timer told me to never mix corn with fruit, so I may have to make this one a "virgin" although that kind of "screws" with love (ok: stop me)

There is nothing more transformative then the power of love.

Happy Valentines day dear Margaret

... daisy... said...

Oh she's my favourite Goddess too! I find her so "human" in her falling in love and make a mess of his "love life" :-) Anyway she's THE Goddess and as usual you are so good at writing!!!!

Susan Campisi said...

I've had many misadventures in love, so Venus is my gal. I'll order a Venus's Apple (or Venus's Nipple?) tonight (while out with the girlfriends) and toast to Venus and never giving up on love. And I'll toast to you too, Margaret.

Daisy said...

In some Countries, this is "Friendship Day" Alas, Venus is secondary, along with Hallmark! So I celebrate good friends and very classy, interesting bloggers (you know who you are) who share their wit, and love, with us.

altadenahiker said...

The abalone consortium is still reeling from their loss in the bidding war.

Joanne said...

Happy Valentine's Day, Margaret :)

Deb @ PaperTurtle said...

It would take a lot more than a mere apple to make me fall behind in a race! Love the drink recipe - and I'm with Olga on the name! ;o)

Happy V-day, Margaret!

Linda Dove said...

I have a whole new respect for the Atalanta story now, since she had heretofore melded with the voice of Marlo Thomas for me. Free To Be You And Me album was a big influence in childhood. Go figure.

Petrea said...

Olga--great minds--

I used to hate Valentine's day. It would have done me some good to have known more about Venus back then.

Thanks, Margaret, and I hope you all had a lovely Valentine's day.

Shell Sherree said...

Happy Valentine's Day! I always liked the clamshell thing. Not too many people can pull off that look as well as Venus can. Bottoms up.

Jean Spitzer said...

Happy Valentine's Day.

wv: runsinde

WritingNut said...

I hope you had a wonderful Valentine's day! :)

pasadenapio said...

Rocking thy toga is definitely a lost art.

claire said...

I will have to try that cocktail! Thank you for the recipe :-)

TheChieftess said...

Venus' Apple is so much more subtle and all the more suggestive!!!

Hope you all had a lovely Valentine's Day...maybe V Day really stands for Venus' Day!!!