11/28/11

The Scout Report: How the Holiday Season is Shaping Up

Although retailers report a record-breaking Black Friday, hopes for a strong holiday season remain uncertain.  The continued aging of the youth market continues to result in more num-nums making if from the plate to the mouth and, hence, spillage and its resultant "bonus treats" remain at an all time low.  There is, however, encouraging evidence that the aging "gray market" will help reverse that trend.  Ever-thicker eye glass lenses and a sometimes sloppy attention to lipstick seem to support what may be a very exciting development.

However, investors looking to make green out of gray should think carefully, as is demonstrated by the disappointing market performance of "the queen."  While increasingly reliable to spill a meatball down her shirt, said meatball is also increasingly likely to land on her protruding belly, which seems to be seconding as a table.  Is there a market opportunity there?  Not if you're eighteen inches high.

Thanksgiving was, frankly, DISAPPOINTING, with only nominal spillage from all attendants, including "grandma," who, quite literally, hoarded gravy that would have made a delicious kibble topping.

Will Christmas be better?  You'd be better off burying your bone.

12 comments:

CafePasadena said...

You have a good, handsome canine!

Joanne said...

Oh but surely Santa will leave Scout an extra treat or two in his stocking? Maybe Scout needs a goddess to help him think positive thoughts.

Olga said...

Too, too funny. (Scout in our family is a cat, but she might have had similar thoughts because she kind of thinks she is a sheep dog.)

Vanda said...

Adorable! Invite me over for lunch, and I give you a practical demonstration of an actually working trickle-down economics.

Petrea Burchard said...

I'm always happy to read a Scout report (and Vanda, you made me laugh).
Someone at our house dropped a tiny cube of pancetta tonight and Boz didn't notice. Regardless of economic conditions, I predict Scout will do well as she is alert to opportunity.

Daisy said...

Scout, I too have a problem reaching the "leftovers" and "dropovers". Perhaps we could compare notes some time?

JCK said...

Will send goodies your way, if found...dear, Scout. You're a cutie.

TheChieftess said...

Ahhh Scout...Kelly is in full agreement!!! While this was her first Thanksgiving, she had heard wondrous stories of goodies making their way to the floor...and she couldn't blame the kitties...they were up in Mammoth eating left over tuna!

Pasadena Adjacent said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pasadena Adjacent said...

At my family gatherings, they only MAKE you feel like your 18 inches tall

Heh

Shell Sherree said...

Oh, poor Scout! There's a lot to be said for eating with fingers and doing away with napkins as a means of economy. I hope there are big improvements on the spillage front on Christmas day.

Susan Campisi said...

You're so cute and well-behaved, Scout. I think the queen should invite you to sit at the table for Christmas.