4/1/13

Walk this Way! Shoes that are kind of awful

This spring, the well-trod women will let her feet do the talking.

On your way to the top? No glass ceiling will stop you in these spiked sandals, although you might impale small co-workers or even amputate a pinky toe when fetching your morning latte. ($40)


Talk about March madness! High tops meet high heels! Three points just for the color alone! ($165)

Domo Arigato, Mr. Roboto! The 80s are back. Chill in these pink dreams. Very good if you have bird ankles. ($90)

Boots! Floral! Wide laces! You don't need to be Laura Ingalls Wilder to look good milking your cow in these babies. Best news of all: They double as mud flaps! ($160)

The blue metallic says, "Kiss my icy lips." The primary color print says, "I don't believe in coloring in the lines." ($80)

Reptilian textured meets graffiti. It says, "I live for danger! ($100)

Breathtaking! I defy you to find an uglier shoe. ($195)

Wanna have fun! I dare you to post the ugliest Spring 2013 shoe you can find. (Details: You will win a prize that is practically worthless, but the glory will be more than you can possibly imagine. I get to chose the winner, although input will be accepted. You have to post it by April 15th.)

PS: All shoes available at Nordstorm. Buy at your own risk.

21 comments:

Olga said...

At least the Chinese have stopped (or I hope that they have) the practice of foot binding. Still looks like there is plenty of foot torture going on in the world.

Trish said...

good lord! That last one looks like someone with a BeDazzler and high on meth, went ballistic on them!

Which is why I tend to stick to my basic tennies. Simple, not lethal and gets me around for the 18-20 hours a day I spend in them.

Rois said...

Trish,very funny BeDazzler on meth!

Here is my choice because they confuse me to no end.Where would I ever wear these? Why would anyone wear these?

http://www.fluevog.com/code/?w%5B0%5D=gender%3Awomen&w%5B1%5D=attribute%3AHeel&p=2&pp=1&view=detail&colourID=3784

Margaret said...

Trish: That is a brilliant description. Well done.

Rois: Oh, my friend, those are indeed very special.

Najma Velshi said...

They would help if you were being mugged!(:)

Daisy said...

Those all look kind of painful, but I'm a plain kind of gal!

Katie said...

Yikes! Those all have things to not recommend them. My entry is both ugly and expensive, but at least they ship for free: In the Black Gold

Ms M said...

Sca-a-a-a-a-ry shoes! And I found this blog with a few more sca-a-ary ones:
http://ladygotstyle.blogspot.com/2011/05/crazy-platform-shoes-and-cool-platform.html

Petrea Burchard said...

Rois, those shoes actually made me laugh. And Katie, I didn't even recognize yours as shoes at first.

But I win.

http://outcrowdfashion.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/ugly-collage.jpg


altadenahiker said...

At least two of your examples require an up-to-date tetanus shot. Maybe rabies and distemper, as well.

Star said...

It does boggle the mind, how they could be designed in the first place, approved for production and distribution in the second, and thirdly, even actually purchased by ladies to be pitied for their lack of self-confidence so severe that they have to depend on fads to feel good about themselves. I've seen some whompers in my neighborhood store windows, too. Let's see if I can snap any in time to participate in the contest. May the ugliest shoe win!

Petrea Burchard said...

I was a fashion slave when I was younger, when I could afford to be. But I was only in my mid-30's when the doctor told me the reason my knees were going bad and everything hurt so much was my shoes. And they were nothing like the torturous shoes young women wear today.

It's been posited that fashion is symbolic of keeping women down (un-liberated), which I'd believe if men weren't fashion slaves, too.

TheChieftess said...

Give me a pair of Uggs up here or flip flops down south and I'm happy...

Those red spiked babies have got to be worn with form fitting leather with all kinds of straps and dominatrix paraphernalia...

Alison said...

My daughter has a pair with spikes on....and I shudder every time she puts them on!
Alison xx

Susan Campisi said...

Oh my. You've all found some frighteningly ugly shoes. Well done.

Petrea Burchard said...

Are you going to do a Scary Shoes post?

http://www.dinsfashion.info/ugly-shoes/

Okay, then, how about this?
http://www.shoewawa.com/2012/05/ugly_shoe_of_th_191.html

Desiree said...

I actually really like the first pick. They're red, they're spiky.
They shout VIOLENT BITCH. They're on my side.

Pasadena Adjacent said...

I wonder if the seller makes you sign a liability waver when you purchase their shoes?

Little Messy Missy said...

I will stick to flip flops...hahahahah!! xoxoxox

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Star said...

I definitely vote for Katie's entry of those Giuseppe Zanotti...aahh...shoes. My gawd, those are so hideous that they have been haunting me...seriously! Everything else pales in comparison.