Wise Women Friday: My Own Brilliant Daughter

From the conclusion of my fifth grader's "math autobiography":

"The thing I've learned from math 

is that even if you don't like things, 

you have to do them anyway."

And now you are a woman, my child, for there are two lessons that all girls must learn in order for them to cross the threshold into womanhood.  

One:  Bad hair cuts happen, and they will happen to you.

Two:  You have to do things you don't like to do.  

I do many things that I don't like to do.  As, I'm sure, do you.  But what I mostly dislike doing is visiting the pediatric neurologist.  Surprising, isn't it?  Because if you've been to a pediatric neurologist you know that the waiting room is filled with smiling, laughing parents.  It's true.  They are happy, so happy, so very, very happy that their big, toothy smiles seem cemented to their faces.  Which, of course, they are.  Because if you visit a pediatric neurologist you are not on a pleasure trip.  You are facing a serious issue; and heaven forbid you let your child think so.  So you smile, smile, smile.  

Our serious issue is what's called intractable epilepsy.  My thirteen year old has it.  She's had it since she was five.  Many children with epilepsy outgrow it.  She won't.  Hence the intractable part.  But she is a lovely girl.  Very sweet.  And she has to do what she doesn't like to do too.  Like take medication.  Go to bed early.  Fade to black for thirty seconds a couple of times a week.  

It is not a blessing to have a chronic medical condition, but hardship has its gifts.  And you will find no more empathic thirteen-year-old in the world than my daughter. There is a boy with Asperger's in several of her classes.  She always asks to be seated next to him so that she can watch out for him.  When there are substitutes, she goes up to them and whispers that this boy has a learning difference that affects his emotions because she doesn't want them to yell at him if he acts out in class.  She knows what's it like to feel different, and it has made her a better person, but then, doing what you don't like to do almost always does.  Even when it's nothing more than math.   

Guess what I'm doing today?  Here's a hint: I'm smiling.