Is there ever any particular spot
where on can put one's finger and say,
"It all began that day, at such time
and such a place, with such an incident."
It all began that December afternoon, when I pulled up to Debbie's house in Glendale, and she said, "Don't freak out, but something happened, and we called 911, and your daughter's in the hospital."
When did it happen for you? When did everything change?
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24 comments:
Ugh! What a story--
as for my own: that my dear is where the kernels of our novels lie, buried deep within.
I think I can make an educated guess about your moment.
Let me surprise you about mine. You might think I'm going to go to the dark side but I'm not. It happened in 1973 when I was getting ready to graduate from Junior High. After the worst case of horse fever known to child-kind, my mother relented and said to me "your daddy and me have decided to buy you a horse" continued with parental stipulations blah blah blah. Just like the Wizard of Oz going from black and white to color. Corny metaphor but true. Opened up my world.
this is for you and you can share it with your daughter if you like
Wayne Thiebaud
Gosh I'd have to think about that one - long and deep - be back with you!
Dez: Well you are quite the woman of mystery, aren't you.
PA: I love yours. And I love your link. I think I want it on my wall.
Gaelikaa: I can't wait for what you come up. Having moved to India from Ireland, I think it would be a winner. But we all have so many moments to choose from, don't we. The one I chose, was when my daughter was we were soon to discover that my daughter had epilepsy, and, honestly and truly, that really did change everything for me.
My problem is I know it was August the 7th... and it was the beginning of my most important love story... but can't really remember if it was 1994 or 1995... it actually changed my way of being... Until then I was a little selfish spoilt girl who jumped from boy to boy to feel important (so ashamed to write it, but anyway... it was me back then... not proud about it...). That day for the next four years I would have learnt what it meant to love someone so much to be happy when he was, feel sad when he felt and bla bla. Probably not the most interesting "date" to note here, but... it was important back then. And I am very grateful that it happened. :-)
Wow, Daisy, that's beautiful.
:-)
I don't think I can pinpoint one time or event, but I love PA's story. And the Thiebaud painting is a great choice.
Thought provoking . . . thanks for sharing about your daughter. Mine would probably be that day I brought my daughter home from the hospital and realized that for the foreseeable future, my time, my life, my plans, and my body (pregnancy was much easier than breastfeeding) were not my own. Now, I have a hard time remembering what I even did with all my time when I didn't have a little girl to chase around.
Mine would have to be when I found out that I was pregnant with baby #3 - despite condom usage. Up until then, I carefully planned out and controlled things in my life. That taught me that "control" is an illusion.
What a life changing moment, Margaret. I'm feeling rather lacking in those now that I sit and ruminate upon Agatha's question. I'm sure I have 'a moment' somewhere. I shall further ruminate.
Does anyone know any girls living named Agatha?
How odd you should have written this. I have been toying with an essay about life's moments that pop up with a certain constancy. I have it somewhere between 100 and 1000.
In one aspect of my life, I have spent many hours trying to find that "Can you hear me now?" moment when I lost contact.
Pardon me for dogging you down for the details, but what happened to your daughter?
I think I could isolate several of these moments, but what is interesting is the difference between those moments when you know something has happened and those other moments when something momentous has happened but you don't realize until later that it was a turning point.
Two moments come to mind. The first, when I was 13 and my classmate pulled out a gun and shot our teacher three times, killing him and forever changing my idea of safety and danger, good guys and bad guys, and generally sending me into a vortex of existential confusion that lasts to this day.
The other: seeing the lights of greater metropolitan Los Angeles spread out in front of me as I drove in at sunset in a ten year old truck packed with all my belongings. I was 23 and had just left Texas to start a new life here. I'll never forget the feeling of belonging, like I'd finally found home.
This is a fascinating question, Margaret (and Agatha). I have many of these. Some are beautiful. Some are terrifying. Some I may never write about.
I think there are things we learn to live with but never get over.
Everything changed for me the moment I discovered I was loved - and loveable. It took me out of myself and animated me to love other people.
Powerful stuff is love!
I remember it. 4 may 2005 in Karlstejn castle in Czech republic. My friend was sad, and I sang two songs for the castle audience (40 people, I think Germans). From that moment my life continued in this stupid crazy pathologic way.
I want to thank everyone for their evocative comments. Laurie's was especially chilling, and I totally know what Bec means. I've thought of another one: It all started when when I got that paper route the summer after seventh grade and used all my money to buy a typewriter.
Deborah: Sorry to keep you hanging. What happened is that my daughter had had a seizure while at a friend's house. It was then that we learned she has epilepsy, which continues to be something that challenges her -- and us.
Italo, I wish I could have heard you sing.
There seems to be a theme here of losing and finding.
As for me, I have been to Hell and back so many times in my life that I am hard pressed to identify just one time - one moment. Movement and change and all that is ephemeral are the subject and content of my work.
I am indeed grateful for my current stability.
My moment was when my first child was born rather ill, his Kali-like paternal grandmom got all crazy and possessive - and my spouse supported her! Duhhhh! This Celtic goddess was NOT impressed!
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