12/14/12

Dear Santa

Well. Grades are posted, weeks of backlogged emails have been addressed, oceans of laundry are done,  and the dog has been walked. Finally, I can take a minute and write my letter to Santa:

Dear Santa:

I hope you are doing well and that you are not too stressed out about this season of joy. Since you are SO busy, I will get right to the point: I have been EXCELLENT this year.  It's true, the dust bunnies managed a successful assault on the hallway and there was the time I fed the children leftover cheesecake for breakfast, and I did take my fifteen-year-old to see the raunchy R-rated movie "Campaign," but I have also personally--with my own hands--moved dying worms from the concrete sidewalk to the dirt and steamed broccoli almost every night this entire year. It seems to me that that should make me worthy of something, like, for example:

1. Clothes. It occurs to me that we are sending the wrong message to our children when we dress them better than ourselves.  It sends the message that mom is worth very little. Is that really what we want them to think? I think not. I will take the burden on myself to teach my adorable offspring that lesson. If you're not sure about the size, gift cards or cash will suffice.

2. Furniture. I'm going to be honest, Santa. The couch has not been the same since you sat on it last year. It's lost its spring, and I have never liked that plaid. It is way too old man for someone as effervescent as me.

3. A new car. I know it's very bulky, but we're talking thirteen years, Santa. THIRTEEN!

4. A paint job for the house. The paint is peeling, Santa! Can't you get the elves on that? I mean, really, what do they have to do after Christmas? You can totally start in the spring.

5. A vacation house in Spain. The country is going through tough fiscal times! I could help the Spanish by spending a lot of money (you could give me that too) in their country! I am selfless that way.

6. Time. You can cover the globe in one night, but for the rest of us this world spins pretty fast. Really, I'd settle for a a couple days of lounging in the house. (Hint: it's not lounging if the adorable offspring are asking me what's for dinner and then complaining about the answer. In fact, to be brutally honest, it is not lounging if the adorable offspring are anywhere nearby.)

Now, Santa, a greedier person would keep going, but I am not greedy. I am the epitome of kindness and generosity (see #5). I will wait with bated breath for Christmas morning. If my stocking isn't spacious enough, feel free to bring a bigger one!

Love,

Margaret

13 comments:

Cafe Pasadena said...

MF, you remind me of soimething: I need a new camera.

My old junker is going through death pangs. Just a DSLR Nikon, or Canon - reliability - should suffice. Not picky.

Since you seem to have the ear of Santa, could you have St. Nick put my gift wish on his list. I appreciate it. If Santa calls you greedy, just say, "it's not for me. It's for my fav canine blogger friend!" So, suddenly Santa will know you think of the well-being of others as well.

In fact, I'm so non-picky you can even include my desperate need on anyone's Christmas gift list. I'm willing to take this new camera from anybody!

Thank You, Santa & Margaret.
Merry Christmas!!

Olga said...

I hope Santa is listening because if you can't convince him, who can?

Ms M said...

That's a very good letter to Santa. I hope he appreciates the time you took with it and brings you everything on your list :-)

Petrea Burchard said...

Don't get me started. My list is so long. Santa, let's just exchange a few emails and work it out.

altadenahiker said...

Something tells me the paint job will trump the house in Spain.

Star said...

Hmmm, letter to Santa...good idea. I'd better get started...it's gonna take awhile....

TheChieftess said...

If Santa brings me a vacation home in Spain, I'll gladly join you Margaret in helping the Spanish economy!!!

Adele said...

This is a fab letter. Do you freelance in this area? I could use some help!

Deb @ Paper Turtle said...

Haha - I wondered if there would be a letter to Santa again this year. I think you totally deserve everything on this list!

Pasadena Adjacent said...

I'll paint your house if you take me to Spain with you

Alison said...

Santa must really enjoy getting your letters!......in your absence, I am trying to keep the Spanish economy going...would love your help though!
Alison xx

Susan Campisi said...

An iPad is at the top of my list, so I hope you don't mind if I borrow your letter to Santa from last year. I'll add this year's #6 as I could really use a couple of days lounging in the house.

Jean said...

i can't believe i'm not the only one moving dying earthworms off the pavement...