My Exciting Life as an Author (Read no further if you are easily plagued by envy and jealousy)

Put on your sunglasses! The dazzling, hot brightness of my literary career is likely to burn a hole right through your retina.  Saturday, I was invited to participate in a book signing at the illustrious Los Angeles Times Festival of Books. I was invited by Prospect Park Books, the publisher of Literary Pasadena, an anthology of short fiction that includes my story "Genius Unleashed."

Naturally, my schedule is extremely busy, what with all my important obligations to the grocery story and laundry machine. But since I like to show my appreciation to the little people, I promised the good people at Prospect Park Books that I would try and squeeze them in.

They insisted on sending a car, but--now that I am famous and people are always looking to me as a role model--I said, "No! The planet needs me to take mass transit." Here I am on the bus showing ordinary people how authentic and normal I am. I'm with author Petrea Burchard. (I think you can see that I am bit more authentic than Petrea, but that's because I'm all about my art and Petrea is all about her cheekbones.)

When your work is in an anthology, you naturally are delighted to share the spotlight with fellow co-authors, and I was especially delighted because I am not the sort of person who seeks glory. So, of course, it was a RELIEF to stand in the back of our booth and hand copies of Elizabeth, the First Wife, to Lian Dolan, whose previous book, Helen of Pasadena, was an LA Times best seller and who perfect strangers come up and talk to as if they are all part of the same carpool.  Lian has a story in Literary Pasadena too. So do Naomi Hirahara and Dianne Emley, Wally Rudolph and Petrea, who were all also at the signing. They are all kind of a big deal, but again, I'm all about my art so, you know, I don't begrudge them their awards and per diems and book club invitations. Give me an un-air-conditioned bus and a little carpel tunnel syndrome and I'm good!

After the signing was when the real fun began. Here I am hobnobbing with the always charming Julia Sweeney (The tiny person to the right of the big head).

Julia read from her new memoir, If It's Not One Thing, It's Your Mother. I am sure she wanted to ask me all about The Goddess Lounge, etc, but I just felt like: It's your moment, Julia. Enjoy it!  I already spent an hour handing books to Lian Dolan. I'm good.

XOX to all of you. One day I may be too good for you, but, for now, I am still humble me.