I am not a bad cook, but I am not a Martha Stewart cook, either. I come from good German stock. I make simple food, and it never resembles food porn. My cake platters have as much frosting as my cakes. My sandwiches are unevenly sliced. My cupcakes are of varying sizes and shapes.
As I worriedly contemplate the menu and furrow my brow at the thought of Susan Carrier's miniature Pecan tassies, I give you three things to ponder.
One. A refresher of the winning entry, a lovely poem by our bacon winner, Linda Dove
Two. A haiku for the vegetarians, courtesy of Paula Johnson.
Three. A picture that I think must have inspired Paula.
On the Stove in the Kitchen
by Linda Dove
The anticipation of this bacon in the pan;
Pastries for a salt-toothed girl.
Paula's Haiku
The average pig
counts on vegetarians
to save his bacon.
Click here to see the very pigs Paula must have been talking about, and thanks to Altadena Hiker for bringing this photo from Greenwich Village Daily Photo to my attention.
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12 comments:
I don't blame u, Professor. If I were female, I'd be gettin more than a little nervous too when a brunch of xxtreme competitive women gather in one place!
I hate to edit U, MF, but I think U left out the word, "and", btween "food porn" in your 2nd sentence.
Make everyone bring stuff, then you don't have to do it all. My sandwiches are uneven, too. Do you see me photographing the results of my cooking for my blog?
Hey pup: I welcome your edits, but I'm not seeing it. What should it say?
Petrea: Well...I will not deny people to bring food if they want too...
I photographed my efforts twice. Lots of people visited, but no one bid on my meal for the silent auction. Just jealousy probably.
Enough with the fretting. I'm sure you'll do fine and if not we'll lie to you.
You don't have to be Martha Stewart, just don't be Sandra Lee! I know you won't know who she is because she's on the Food Network, but she's this crazy lady who does a show where she redecorates her kitchen every episode to go with her outfit and then seems to plan the food to go with the decore and outfit. Kate and I sometimes watch it just to mock her! She always has a very special coctail and "table scape". You really can't describe the "blogloriousness" of it.
AH: Anyone who knows you is jealous of you, so OF COURSE it's jealousy.
PA: I like your attitude. You're right. These are all nice people. They'll lie through their teeth!
Lynne: Personally, I always redecorate my kitchen and and choose my clothes to match my food. Is there a problem with that?
Margaret, I have two words for you:
SUBDUED LIGHTING
I wouldn't worry overmuch. Often the goodies that don't look perfect are the most delicious!
Hey, I waxed lyrical about bacon grease. Anything sort of food preparation impresses me!
But do let me know if I can bring anything....
Did you have any of my bacon-wrapped dates today? I hope so!!
I officially can't come next weekend. Boohoo!! But I'm sure you'll have fun.
BTW, my son now says his life's dream is to have a restaurant called "The Bacon Shack."
Maybe he will.
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